Quiet

This is what my mornings look like, when I sit to write.
I love mornings, before the sunrise, on a rainy day, when the light is so dim it seems that it won't come again, ever.  I remember so many mornings in Virginia, writing through the most agonizing heartbreak of my adult life, staring at the bare limbs of the trees and the near absence of light.  And every morning it was the same: dim winter light, a mug or two of coffee, and me typing away at it.  I remember the feeling that I was doing work that would change my life, and I was, in a way.  That act of sitting down each morning gave me something, made me keep going.  I'd relive memories I wouldn't wish on anyone, and I'd cry sometimes writing the project.  I became very sick, because the project hurt so much to write.  To write that work, I had to keep myself in that pain, and at one point, nearly starving to death and going absolutely mad, I stopped.  I told myself that someday, when I was well, I'd go back to it.  I don't know how I knew that things would get better, but they did.  I guess.  I still have the work I did, printed and clipped.  I wrote a scene under a bare light bulb that still gives me chills to read.  That book is the last book I'll write, I already know.  I know the plot,  and the characters, but it is the last book. The light, though, dim light, makes me think of it.
Today, I'll try to keep adding in the layers to the new story I'm working on.  This new story isn't as dense as the two I've just written (those two are DENSE) and I'll be happy to have another working draft of something.  If I'm very careful with my time, I might be able to both write a new story this weekend and do a tremendous amount of editing.
As far as the cleanse is going, I've got great energy again.  I'm sleeping quite deeply, and that feels good.  For the first week I needed an unusual amount of sleep and it made me nervous, because I hate wasting time sleeping.  But now, the sleep need is coming back to my favorite, the six hour range.  I feel good in the days.  The sugar cravings have abated.  I have some hunger but not much.  I feel pretty good now, in general.  Also, the terrible sadness I had the first week is lessening.  I was almost afraid I was sliding into a depression.  It was just the adjustment to clean living.  An interesting thing, I feel less congested with mucous, throughout the body.  My body feels more optimized already.